My favourite real part of Live Earth?

The Tap. They were legendary. Apart from the bit where the Beeb cut away to show Rhianna in feckin Japan!!! Will I ever be free of that woman?!?!?!

My second favorite bit?

Watching the Pussycat Dolls talk about Arnold Schwarzenneger being the “Mayor” of California.

My third favourite bit?

Madonna telling people that if they wanted to save the planet they had to jump up and down to Ray Of Light.

I never knew…